I’m missing the Mummy gene

OK, before I start, here’s a disclaimer … I adore my children and they know it (I asked). And this post is a wee bit late but I’ve been a bit leery about writing it because there are such strong ideas about Mummies.

But, I’m going to take a deep breath and just say it: I’m one of those mothers who DIDN’T cry or feel like crying when my kids started school.

I read and enjoyed the posts last month on MamaMia from Kim Wilkins and Sarah Macdonald about their babies starting big school and I follow celebrity mums Jessica Rowe (@msjrowe) and Mia Freedman (@MiaFreedman) on Twitter who both cried when their eldest and youngest (respectively) started school.

But me? Nope. I mentally kicked up my heels and went home to a blissfully quiet house.

I think I’m missing the Mummy gene.

My babies are 24 and 21 and you might be thinking I don’t remember that far back (god, 20 years!) but I do because I was one of the few mothers who didn’t cry at the school gate.

I’ve raised smart, funny, responsible adults and adore spending time with them but here are a few things that support my non-mummy gene idea:

  • When my eldest was in Year 4 (aged 9), she walked herself and her 5-year-old brother to school BY HERSELF.
  • They were in bed at 7.00 most nights (and sometimes earlier if we’d had a busy day or I’d had enough).
  • Lots of times the kids had noodles or spaghetti on toast for dinner and hubby and I had a nicely cooked meal after they went to bed.
  • When they got to high school, they had to make their own breakfast and lunch.

But I must have done something right.

One day my daughter and I went to a laughter workshop and when we were all asked what laughter meant to us, our beautiful girl said the thing she most remembers and loves about our family was that we always laughed.

That’s when I cried.

2 thoughts on “I’m missing the Mummy gene

  1. Love this post. I organised a morning tea for the new kindy mums a few years ago. I was astounded by how many we’re devastated to be ‘losing’ their children to school. I never felt that, not with any of my three, not for kindy and not when I dropped my 12yo son off for his first day of high school where he knew no-one in his grade of 180 students.

    You might be missing the mummy gene, but I think the mother gene is definitely in place. It is possible to love, nurture, encourage and challenge our children without the tears and sentiment. Not that the latter is wrong, but it doesn’t make us wrong if we’re not that way.

    • Hear, hear! Thanks for the lovely comment. And I think it’s important that my kids see that, although I love them to distraction, I don’t feel that I’m losing them when they start on their next big challenge and it’s OK for them not to be the centre of my world

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